Category Archives: Non-Fiction

Non-Fiction book reviews

Aug4

Book Review | Sliding Into Home by Kendra Wilkinson

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Book Review | Sliding Into Home by Kendra Wilkinson

As a huge fan of the show The Girls Next Door that ran on E! for a few seasons, I was looking forward to reading Sliding Into Home by Kendra Wilkinson. It was a great memoir from an interesting TV personality, but I learned a lot more about the woman behind the image. Kendra was a troubled teen, turned girlfriend to Hugh Hefner. She is now a wife and mother who successfully nabbed her own spin-off show entitled Kendra after The Girls Next Door ended.

Although Kendra has settled into a pretty calm existence, it was a long and bumpy road to get there. The book chronicles her story, beginning with her younger years growing up as a rebellious child in San Diego. Her parents broke-up when she was very young and she struggled to overcome her daddy issues. Those issues, along with a lack of supervision, allowed her to get into a world of trouble. She began partying, sleeping around, and drinking at a very early age. Despite her mother and grandmother’s efforts to keep her grounded in sports and other worthwhile activities, Kendra drifted away from school and into a world of drug use and promiscuity. I won’t give away everything, but her story was very interesting. I think it was key that she tackle the roots of her insecurities and issues because that helps the reader to understand how she ended up at the Playboy Mansion.

Kendra is candid about her time there, yet she is very respectful of Hugh Hefner and the other girls. She talks about the things we all want to know about life as Hugh Hefner’s girlfriend – she discusses the crazy rumors about wild parties and bedroom romps, the many do’s and don’ts, as well as the fighting between she and the other girls. All in all, it was her experience at the Playboy Mansion that prepared her for her life today. She broke a lot of the rules to spend time with Hank Baskett, the NFL player whom she would eventually wed. Although Kendra only shared tidbits of Hank’s story, I would love to hear more about it. He seems like a genuinely interesting person who has been through a lot. His own background is what allowed him to care for Kendra and overlook her past.

For all of its great parts, there were one or two disappointments about the book. Namely, it’s not gritty enough. If you’ve seen any episodes of Kendra’s show, you know that Hank likes to keep the past in the past. Kendra was known as a party girl and he wasn’t happy about her writing such a candid book about her past exploits and drug use. I think it is because of this that she leaves out some key details about life at the Mansion as well as the truth about about an explicit tape of her and an old boyfriend that was released before the book came out. On the show she implicated that the whole issue would be discussed in the book, but it was not.

All in all, I think this is a great read for anyone who is a fan of either of her shows. There were a few surprises as far as life at the Mansion and even a few insights into the lives of Bridget and Holly, Kendra’s co-stars on The Girls Next Door. I have more respect now for Hugh Hefner, even if I don’t completely understand or agree with his lifestyle. It sure makes for great entertainment. Check out the book and let me know what you think!

Jun9

Article Review | NY Times ‘Going Natural’ Requires Lots of Help

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Article Review | NY Times ‘Going Natural’ Requires Lots of Help

Debra's Hair (Braidout)

It’s time for me to confess! Hair care blogs are my guilty pleasure. I discovered the world of healthy hair care three years ago, right before I started law school. Shortly after that time, there was a steady, rapid increase in the number of African-American women “going natural.”

Apparently, the NY Times has yet again decided to write about this phenomenon. A new article in today’s issue features several popular bloggers/YouTubers on the natural hair scene. I’m familiar with all three of these women and I’ve followed their work carefully over the years, although I am not natural. (I have grown out my relaxed hair.) The article discusses how naturals need “lots of help” going natural. I would imagine that some naturals will take issue with those sentiments because they once again re-enforce the notion that natural hair is difficult, time-consuming, and costly. While it is true that many new naturals spend a lot of time and money on hair care, some do not. Many African-American women have never had relaxers, so they have managed their natural hair without “lots of help” for many years.

For the most part, the article was well-written. The author could have left out the reference to “Good Hair” because that movie was more of a mockumentary of the black hair experience than a documentary. The movie didn’t really discuss natural hair at all. It focused more on weaves and relaxers. Chris Rock also failed to acknowledge the healthy hair scene which was already in rapid bloom at the time the movie was developed.

Back to the NY Times article, one interesting angle covered in the article was money. While the love of natural kinks and coils is surely motivation for bloggers and vloggers to help other women, money is a big motivating factor as well. There’s money in beauty and when it comes to natural hair, women and companies are willing to pay up. Women are looking for the next best product. Companies are looking for the next best blogger to help them advertise.

All in all, the article was interesting. As an African-American woman with relaxed hair, I’ve moved away from the now natural-hair dominated hair blogs and forums, but I think they are a great resource. I didn’t care for the description of relaxers as “caustic paste” – more propganda, in my opinion. But, you can be the judge. Check out the article for yourself.

Jun9

Book Alert! How To Get Out of Your Own Way by Tyrese Gibson

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Book Alert! How To Get Out of Your Own Way by Tyrese Gibson

Actor/singer Tyrese Gibson has written a book entitled How To Get Out of Your Own Way. Normally, my eyes would gloss over at the thought of yet another entertainer writing an autobiographical how-to for the rest of us. But, after hearing Tyrese speak about this book on The Mo’Nique show, my interest was piqued. Tyrese lived the hard-knock life growing up in Watts, California. Despite his strained relationship with his family, this talented young man was able to hit it big in the recording industry thanks to his exceptional talent and a couple of lucky breaks.

It hasn’t been a smooth ride. His divorce and a few other events have been bumps along the way. In this book, Tyrese discusses how he successfully overcame these obstacles. He also shares relationship advice as he reflects on his recent divorce. The book has mostly 5-star reviews on Amazon, so I downloaded it on my Kindle. I’m studying for the bar exam, so I haven’t read it yet. While you’re waiting on my review, check the book out and let me know what you think!

Apr18

Quick Review: The Money Class by Suze Orman

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Quick Review: The Money Class by Suze Orman

I’ve been reading up a storm, but I haven’t had much time for reviews. I had to take the time to write a quick review on Suze Orman’s latest title Money Class.

I was looking forward to this book and even pre-ordered a hard copy from Amazon. Once it arrived, I eagerly jumped into it. I was not able to get past the first couple of chapters, however, because this book so preachy. Suze goes on and on about how these days are not the good old days. She states that people need to stop spoiling their kids, stop pining for the easy jobs and easy credit of the past, and so forth.

For me, this was useless advice. I’m not a frivolous spender, I don’t spoil my kids, and I have already accepted that I’m living in a recession (despite the recession “officially” being over).  As far as wasting money, this book was a waste. When I finish reading all of the books I have on my Kindle and finish the bar exam, and any other thing that I need to do, I will probably re-visit this book and write a full review.

For now, I find this title so boring and un-helpful that I simply cannot recommend it. If I can add one positive note, the book comes with an online subscription to the Money Class on Suze’s websites which has money resources, such as links and forms that Suze mentions in her book. Some people may find this site helpful. I logged in once and I haven’t re-visited it. It’s nothing that you can’t find on Dave Ramsey’s page for free.

If you’re a huge Suze fan, I’d say wait a while and see what others have to say about this book before purchasing it. If you are really struggling to get your finances together after taking some serious hits in the recession, then this book may help you. It’s Suze’s standard advice, only updated for the current times. If you can’t stand Suze’s advice, then this book certainly won’t convert you.

Hopefully, I’ll be posting more financial book reviews soon. As always, happy reading!

Aug11

Book Review | His Needs Her Needs by Willard E. Harley, Jr.

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Book Review | His Needs Her Needs by Willard E. Harley, Jr.

His Needs Her Needs is an unusual read for me because it’s a book about marriage, and I’m not married! The book was introduced to me by a very good friend who was nice enough to provide me with a copy of it. It took me a while to work through the book because of my busy schedule. But, when I finally sat down to read it, I flew right through the book.

The book is about how to make your marriage “affair-proof” as well as how to save a marriage that’s already suffered from an affair. Even though this is a marriage book, it’s also a good book for those who have been in a long-term relationship that may be lagging. The basic premise is that you have to meet your spouse’s needs, and he or she has to meet yours in order to keep your relationship affair-proof. The scary thing about this book is that it makes you realize how easy it is for one mate to kind of “fall into” an affair, as well as how difficult it is to let a lover go. Although that’s not the focus of the book, it’s something for couples to take seriously. The scenarios that are given thoughout the book are really helpful in visualizing the concepts that the author describes.

The hopeful part is that, with hard work and the dedication of both parties, each can meet the other’s needs and stay together. The author says that in a real relationship, each partner’s needs might be different, but he does generalize the 5 basic needs of each partner. For women, he lists the needs as affection, conversation, honesty, financial support, and family commitment. For men, he lists the needs at sexual fulfillment, recreational companionship, an attractive spouse, domestic support, and admiration. Clearly, we can think of examples when the other partner of the opposite sex needs the same thing as the other partner. But, the author bases his lists of needs on his work with couples over many years.

One of the most surprising sections of the book was the “attractive spouse” section. Many partners may not want to believe that “attractiveness” is a need that their mate has, but the author is truthful, basically telling you to stay in shape, or at least try to stay as attractive as you were when your mate met you. This is especially true for women, who often times let themselves go. He says that attractiveness is not as important to women, but you must, again, assess the needs of your mate.

One important note that I’d like to make is that you should try to read this book with your mate BEFORE an affair to try to avoid one. If you learn about how to keep each other’s “love bank” (read the book for more info on that) full, then you won’t have to worry about trying to overcome an affair!

This was a good read, and I hope to put this author’s suggestions into practice in my relationships in the future.

Jul21

Book Review | 12 Steps to Raw Foods by Victoria Boutenko

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Book Review | 12 Steps to Raw Foods by Victoria Boutenko

I read this book based on a suggestion from a co-worker. She’s a new raw foodist, and she seemed extremely enthusiastic about the lifestyle. After I and a few other interns purchased her a raw food cookbook, she graciously made us a raw breakfast and a raw lunch the next day! She even brought in her Vita-Mix and a ton of supplies from Whole Foods.

I greatly enjoyed the spread that she prepared for us, so a couple of days later, I purchased 12 Steps to Raw Foods. My co-worker said that this was the first raw foods book that she and her daughter read. It started them off on their raw food journey. In effect, it started me off as well. (Though, I have not committed to the raw food lifestyle! I’m still experimenting. I was enthusiastic at first, but now…not so much.)

The author, Victoria Boutenko is very well known in the raw food world. She popularized the dynamic Green Smoothie (a smoothie made of veggies and fruit), and she and her family have published several raw food books. In 12 Steps, Boutenko describes how she and her family were suffering from various illnesses and ailments. Out of desperation, they went raw cold-turkey. Victoria and her family’s health improved immediately. They had more energy, no longer needed medicine, and they felt better than they had in years.

A large majority of the book is devoted to convincing the reader why the raw foods lifestyle is best. In the original text, Victoria takes somewhat of a fundamentalist approach, advocating a 100% raw food lifestyle. In the expanded, updated edition (the one I have), she softens her approach, admitting that a 100% raw food lifestyle may not be best for everyone. This change may be because, as of today, Victoria is not 100% herself. She is what is known as a high-raw foodist.

My main criticism of the book is the fantastical claims about the health benefits of raw foods. Of course, vegetables and fruits are full of essential nutrients that many are missing in the Standard American Diet (SAD). So, adding these items into one’s diet almost guarantees short-term physical improvements. I didn’t find myself convinced that raw is the reason for the improvements, versus a healthier diet in general.

There was also a lot of spiritual talk in the book. As someone of faith, I wasn’t completely bothered by it. I just don’t think that raw food should be so deeply linked with the raw food movement/diet.

Lastly, I was very disappointed with the recipes in this book. They were overly simplistic. For example, the “I Can’t Believe It’s Just Cabbage,” recipe was ridiculous. Basically, Victoria suggested tossing cabbage with oil and salt…wow, creative. I think anyone could have thought to toss a veggie with oil and salt. There are a lot of raw foods out there with really great recipes, but this is not one.

If you are looking to turn to raw foods as a completely lifestyle change, versus just a diet, then this is probably the book for you. If you are simply looking to loose a few pounds, you may want to try The Raw Food Detox Diet by Natalia Rose. If you want simple raw food recipes, I would suggest Raw Food: A Complete Guide to Every Meal of the Day by Erica Palmcratz and Irmela Lilja. A review of Palmcratz’s book will be posted soon!

Jul13

Diet Book Review | The Calorie King 2009 Calorie, Fat, and Carbohydrate Counter 2009

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Diet Book Review | The Calorie King 2009 Calorie, Fat, and Carbohydrate Counter 2009

Calorie King 2009Last week, I posted my review on The Writing Diet by Julia Cameron, in which Cameron encourages people to write down what they eat to aid in losing weight. Well, as I started utilizing the technique, I realized that I knew very little about the nutritional value, or lack of, in the foods that I was eating. I had seen Eat This, Not That at Target, so that is the book that I planned to pick up.

Instead, I ended up getting The Calorie King 2009 Calorie, Fat, and Carbohydrate counter 2009 (Large Print Edition). It’s pocket-sized, and includes more than just calorie counts. As the title indicates, it also has the overall nutritional content of foods at popular restaurants. The best part is that it includes thousands of grocery items and non-grocery items that you prepare at home. For instance, it’s hard to tell how many calories are in a sandwich that you make at home. However, by adding together the calorie count for a two slices of bread,  a slice of bacon, a piece of lettuce, and a teaspoon of mayo, you can calculate the nutritional content of your favorite BLT easily.

It’s full of graphics, too, which keep you from becoming bored with it too quickly. The Biggest Loser Complete Calorie Counter guide was a few dollars cheaper, but I went with this one because the BLCCC was black and white, while this one was glossy and full of color. Basically, I like shiny things.

I can’t say that I actually count all of my calories every single day. That would be a little too much for me, but I do grab the guide on my way out to eat. It has helped me make better choices at my favorite restaurants like Chilli’s where the fried chicken crispers, with corn and fries are a whopping 1880 calories! Needless to say, I haven’t ordered them since buying this book.

It works well as a handy guide to add up calories and nutritional content, and in the beginning of the book, it has practical advice on dieting, cutting down on sugar and saturated fat, and ways to effectively lose weight.

Unfortunately, not every single restaurant that I frequent is included – and for some restaurants, many of my favorite dishes are not listed. There is usually a way to work-around by using the grocery items as a comparison.

The biggest downside to this book is the price. If you don’t want to pay $10 or more for a little book, lots of the same information is available online for free, either directly at the restaurant’s website or on thedailyplate.com.

What are some of your favorite free, online sources for nutrition information?

Jul12

Book Review | How to Marry the Man of Your Choice by Margaret Kent

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Book Review | How to Marry the Man of Your Choice by Margaret Kent

how to marryThis book is strictly for women who want to be married now. It’s not for women who are holding on tight to the strict dating codes that they have been practicing for all of their lives. After all, if those practices were working, then these women would be married.

Margaret Kent offers a step-by-step plan for getting women from flirting to the alter, and covers many of the follies that women make in between, such as refusing to take the initiative (waiting for him to call), not smiling and speaking to people on the street (MANY of us are guilty of this), and simply being too picky (logically, this cuts down on the number of men available for you to marry). Kent points out that many women behave as if there are an infinite supply of men to choose from (the bus mentality – when one passes you by, there is a another one coming). The reality is that at there may not be another man coming. If this is the one you want, you have to make it happen.

What I liked about this book, however, is that Kent makes it clear that it needs to be the man of your choice. You don’t have to settle simply because you are ready to get married. You only have to work to convince the man that you want that he needs you. Kent provides a complete how-to, including what to do to keep your engagement from ending. For example, you should be willing to marry your mate with or without a wedding. If you want a wedding more than you want a marriage, then you just might get your wish.

Even though I may not be ready to be married, per se, this book also made me think about how I speak to and relate to people in general. The dating techniques that lead to marriage are closely intertwined with persuasion skills, and those are skills that can be transferred to other relationships besides just romantic ones.

Many reviews that I read on this book criticized Kent for encouraging women to give in to their men’s fantasies and desires. I don’t promote any type of promiscuity or doing anything to put your health, safety, or personal comfort in danger. However, if this is the man that you are about to marry, then you should have some level of trust. Kent also encourages living together first. Some people are bothered by this. However, almost all the twenty and thirty-somethings that I know who married, actually did live together first.

Like any dating book, you need to tweak the advice to be in line with your own personal moral code. You can read more about the author and how she nagged not one, but two husbands (her first husband passed) by picking the book up on Amazon, or checking out her site at www.margaretkent.net.

Jul10

Book Review | The Writing Diet: Write Yourself Right-Size by Julia Cameron

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Book Review | The Writing Diet: Write Yourself Right-Size by Julia Cameron

dietHow I Found The Writing Diet

The Writing Diet is one of the many books that I have found rather randomly on the book shelves at Barnes and Noble, but I am very glad that I did.

As I was perusing the shelves for a summer read that would help me become more focused on my creative writing, I saw Julia Cameron’s The Writing Diet on the shelf – actually in the diet book section that I happened to stop by on my way to the writing resources area. Cameron is the author of the popular book and creative writing method The Artist’s Way.

I felt as if I had hit the jackpot! I had actually found a book about writing and dieting – or rather, losing weight and expressing one’s creativity. I purchased the book and a nice new journal to go with it.

I can honestly say that for anyone who has struggled to lose weight, this book may just be the answer. Julia notes that over the years as her students became more self-aware and increased their personal and creative writing, many lost weight quickly and easily!

How The Writing Diet Has Helped Me

I have always resisted writing down what I eat, but Cameron’s method consists of writing down not only what you eat, but why you eat, can be life-changing for someone like me, who has never been “fat” but is struggling to maintain or lose weight. Or maybe you’ve always been the “big” person and that role has become a comfort to you. Either way, opening up about your emotions through writing can be a big step towards making a change.

The first two parts of Cameron’s method include the following: 1) Morning Pages (writing in the morning as a way to express and identify what is “bugging us”) and 2)taking a daily walk.

These were small, but powerful changes that I have been able to make already. Simply by writing down what I was eating, I discovered that I was eating way too much, often chewing mindlessly when I wasn’t hungry. I was basically eating for strange reasons that had nothing to do with nourishment, such as 1) boredom, 2) to save money (eating for free whenever possible), and 3) eating when I was sad and missed my family and loved ones, or 4) eating when I felt “pressured” in group settings, and so on.

I’ve also increased my daily exercise. Instead of eating and complaining, I write out my goals, frustrations, and my plans and solutions. Immediately after writing, it feels like a burden had been lifted and I am no longer dying for a meal from Cheesecake Factory.

How The Writing Diet Can Help You

Many of you may be skeptical, but I challenge you to ask yourself, how often do you stop and think before you eat? Do you jump up and go to lunch with your co-workers without asking yourself – am I hungry? Or what does my body need for nourishment right now? Most of us simply munch, munch, munch, and then get back to work.

Some of you may not feel like writing things down, or you may have convinced yourself that you don’t “have time” to write or take a daily walk. If you are too set in your ways, or prefer to stick with fad diet after fad diet, then this won’t work for you. I will challenge you by presuming that if you have the time to read blogs, you have the time to follow the steps in this book.

There is much more to The Writing Diet method, but you’ll have to read the book to discover the rest. My favorite thing about it is that instead of telling you what to eat, the book helps you understand why you over-eat and indulge, how to get over binges, and how to forgive yourself and quickly move on when you slip up. For those who over-eat, whether you are over-weight or not, a lot of emotion is attached to food and it is important to understand and recognize this in order to fully take control.

I will be reporting back on my progress, but even if I don’t lose a lot of weight, The Writing Diet has made a difference by making me feel more productive, and more in control of what meals I choose to consume. My journal has been a daily part of my routine for over a month now since reading this book, and I truly feel a difference. For more information on Julia Cameron, visit her website at www.theartistsway.com.

If this detailed review was helpful to you, please leave a comment below.

Apr11

Book Review | Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man by Steve Harvey

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Book Review | Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man by Steve Harvey

steve-harveyThis has to be one of the hottest relationship books out right now for women!!! When I was in the salon a few weeks ago, I saw 3 women carrying it around and reading it under the hair dryer! Of course, I jumped on the bandwagon and purchased the hardback book for about $25 from Barnes and Noble (You can find it cheaper on Amazon.com).

Although it is a relatively short and easy read, I must say that it was worth every penny. Steve Harvey qualifies himself to write this book based on his experience as a divorced man, a happily remarried man, currently in a long term marriage, his work helping women with relationship problems via “Strawberry Letters” on his morning show, and all of his time dating, traveling, working, and observing people as a comedian. This book is different from a lot of relationship books, first, because he keeps the premise of the book simple. As a man, Steve recognized that men are simple creatures and that women can basically be in control by setting certain standards, communicating them from the start, and acting like ladies as we communicate with men. The Three P\’s (Profess, Protect, and Provide) are how Steve describes what men are motivated to do for the women that they love, and how they use the three P’s to communicate their love. A lot of the information consists of basic truths that many of us feel, but don\’t recognize. Ladies, if you’ve ever had that “something is wrong” feeling while in a relationship, this book will help you identify and clarify what he is thinking during different phases of your relationship.

If you are a man, you may benefit from this book as well. It might help you recognize why your communication with your woman is failing. This is definitely a good read, infused with comedic relief to soften the harsh blows of reality. After you reading this book, you may find a way to make things work….or let things go.

A recent criticism that I heard about the book is Steve’s advice on sex. He advises women to wait three months to have relations with a man – and only if he has met the standards that Steve lays out. A Christian writer criticized the book for going against Christian values and “okaying” pre-marital sex, while making references to finding a man that loves Jesus. However, when I read the book I felt that Steve was saying to wait at least 3 months, not that women had to wait only three months. In reality, three months may actually be a lot longer than many men and women date before becoming intimate.

If you are looking for a guide to help you better understand the differences between men and women in relationships, you should definitely check out this book. If you are looking for a Christian dating book or advice on how to remain celibate, you may want to pass on this read for a more traditional title; however, you’ll be missing out on a lot of practical dating advice from a pretty credible source.

If you found this review to be helpful, please leave a comment below.