This book is strictly for women who want to be married now. It’s not for women who are holding on tight to the strict dating codes that they have been practicing for all of their lives. After all, if those practices were working, then these women would be married.
Margaret Kent offers a step-by-step plan for getting women from flirting to the alter, and covers many of the follies that women make in between, such as refusing to take the initiative (waiting for him to call), not smiling and speaking to people on the street (MANY of us are guilty of this), and simply being too picky (logically, this cuts down on the number of men available for you to marry). Kent points out that many women behave as if there are an infinite supply of men to choose from (the bus mentality – when one passes you by, there is a another one coming). The reality is that at there may not be another man coming. If this is the one you want, you have to make it happen.
What I liked about this book, however, is that Kent makes it clear that it needs to be the man of your choice. You don’t have to settle simply because you are ready to get married. You only have to work to convince the man that you want that he needs you. Kent provides a complete how-to, including what to do to keep your engagement from ending. For example, you should be willing to marry your mate with or without a wedding. If you want a wedding more than you want a marriage, then you just might get your wish.
Even though I may not be ready to be married, per se, this book also made me think about how I speak to and relate to people in general. The dating techniques that lead to marriage are closely intertwined with persuasion skills, and those are skills that can be transferred to other relationships besides just romantic ones.
Many reviews that I read on this book criticized Kent for encouraging women to give in to their men’s fantasies and desires. I don’t promote any type of promiscuity or doing anything to put your health, safety, or personal comfort in danger. However, if this is the man that you are about to marry, then you should have some level of trust. Kent also encourages living together first. Some people are bothered by this. However, almost all the twenty and thirty-somethings that I know who married, actually did live together first.
Like any dating book, you need to tweak the advice to be in line with your own personal moral code. You can read more about the author and how she nagged not one, but two husbands (her first husband passed) by picking the book up on Amazon, or checking out her site at www.margaretkent.net.
One of my latest reads was The List by Sherri Lewis. When I saw the title on the shelf, I quickly picked it up and purchased it. I have read two other titles by Sherri Lewis – Dance into Destiny and My Soul Cries Out. The title “The List” caught my attention because making a list of all the qualities one wants in a partner is something that is often suggested, especially by older women to younger women. “Do you know what you want in a man?” people often ask a young lady who says she is searching for a mate. After reading the back of this book, it seemed like I’d get some answers about what this list-making is all about! The bright yellow cover with the picture of a pretty black woman with a cute curly afro were simply adorable.
This has to be one of the hottest relationship books out right now for women!!! When I was in the salon a few weeks ago, I saw 3 women carrying it around and reading it under the hair dryer! Of course, I jumped on the bandwagon and purchased the hardback book for about $25 from Barnes and Noble (You can find it cheaper on Amazon.com).
